Day 3, Extended Thoughts

I keep thinking about why I am so determined to do this and why this venture is important to me, and a few thoughts are coming to mind.

First, looking back at this last year I feel like I have nothing to show for it. Yes, I bought a new car and survived knee surgery only a bit worse for the wear, but that doesn't feel like anything special. I miss the days of learning and experiencing. Pre-surgery I was a busy person, and I loved it. Post-surgery I slowed down a lot and just haven't picked up the pace again. I'm not happy about that. I feel like I have become someone other than myself since February and it is time to get back to me.

Second, I'm 24 years old. I feel constantly on the verge of becoming an actual adult. I've been looking at houses to buy the past few months and feel like I'm really growing up. I have an adult job and an adult car and adult bills, and I'm just not ready yet. I look at my parents and a part of me is so scared of one day waking up and being like them, spending all of their time working on the homes they have. Not that there is anything wrong with that at all, and I look at them and hope I can be as successful as they are someday, but I'm not ready for that yet. Having adventures is still something I strive to constantly do. Growing up is not an option quite yet.